How to give a Rottweiler meds

Veterinary medicine has come a long way. Heartworm treatments now come in chewable form and smell like delicious beefy treats. Apparently my dog is smart, though. He's wise to the pharmaceutical tricks, and refuses to stupidly scarf the little nugget of beefy goodness I offer every month. So, if you have a dog that's as smart as Mav, try the following steps.

1. Pretend you're coming in for a hug
2. Put 130 lb Rott in a headlock
3. Pry open jaws of steel
4. Insert hand with pill past razor sharp teeth and into throat
5. Remove hand quickly and pray all fingers come back intact
6. Immediately clamp both hands around snout and repeat the following
pattern until dog swallows giant pill *blow in face, rub throat, beg
for mercy as he struggles to get out of your hands and gag at the same
time*

We do this routine on the first of every month. I've become a pro, kind of. But, I like this guy's sweet face and don't want his heart to be strangled by those nasty worms - so it's worth it!